They’re back. The damn leafblowers. You can hear the shrill, monotonous drone everywhere you go, scattering summer’s last remnants to the four winds. You do realize they’re clearing the way for winter, right? They’re simply harbingers of the frightful snowblower.

But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Today, we have Standard time to contend with. It arrived at 2 o’clock this morning, silent as a burglar, and stole an entire hour of daylight. So put away the sunglasses, ladies and gentlemen, gloom and darkness this way come. Before long we’ll be groping for the light switch at the crack of afternoon.

When I awoke this bright, shiny morning I had an extra hour to fill. 60 idle minutes and no pressing business to attend to. So I sat and I pondered, daydreaming mindlessly. Eventually, my thoughts turned to the coming season and I composed a quick winter pro / con list:
That was the nudge I needed; a reminder of the bone-chilling events ahead. I launched myself at drawers and closets, packing them to the gills with winter woolies — down-filled, Gore Texed, Polar Fleeced, Thinsulated, and thermalized.

A one-way ticket to Florida would’ve been smarter.

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